Things coming to pass

As an infant, I had long hair and wore earrings. I was often mistaken for a girl. And I despised it. I despised my feminine voice and longed to possess a heavier tone. I always wanted to be an adult when I was a kid. But I was small and thought it would take forever for me to achieve puberty. But that day did indeed come. Testosterone spiked.My voice cracked. Hair sprouted on my hitherto tender cheeks and voila! 

In 2012, I joined the law school. I was due to graduate in 2017. When I joined the Law School, there was a President who had just occupied the Rashtrapati Bhavan and Uttar Pradesh had chosen its youngest Chief Minister. It would take a long long time before 2017 shall arrive-I told myself- 9 semesters later, 2017 stares me right in the face. 

All the things that we love, we do not love them enough till we either lose them or are on the verge of it. The fear of loss increases our love for something manifold. So I missed my childhood only after I became an adolescent. 

I am in my final year at the law school. With just one semester to go, my sense of attachment with my alma mater is strengthened with each passing hour. But one semester is all I can hold on to it. 

I spent the first year cribbing over the fact that despite my good rank in CLAT I failed to secure the law school I aimed for. But later the feeling faded away and all I felt for my college was affection. When my ninth semester was over and I packed my bags for vacations, I realised how much this departure pained me. 

Life is full of changes- both desirable and undesirable. We all know that there are many things which we wish to keep tucked away in the back of our minds and focus on the present. Leaving the college is one such thing. But no matter where we may try to bury those things, what is meant to arrive at the right time, will indeed arrive, things destined to occur shall inevitably come to pass. There is no remedy for it. 

Time has let me down. I am deeply disappointed in it. Why does it have to travel faster in moments of emotional upheavel? 2016 shouldn’t have ended this fast. 

I hadnt hoped 5 years, five long years would fleet in such haste.

I hadn’t hoped departure shall come so, so soon.


6 thoughts on “Things coming to pass

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